Oh no! You’re mad and your mind is racing again. You‘re stressed, angry and upset, with unsettling thoughts flying around in your head!
You don’t need this right now, but yet here it is. You try to forget it, to “get over it” and push the upsetting thoughts away, but they come back even stronger!
Now you’re really thinking about it all and you’re wondering what is the best way to deal with it.
If you’re a normal adult, you’ve had to deal with anger and resentment, and you’re not alone, everyone else does as well. For some this is an issue that really causes them trouble and for others it is no problem at all.
You would think that the people who deal with it well have had very little anger and resentment in their lives, while the ones who have trouble in this area must have had a huge amount. This isn’t necessarily the case at all.
It’s not really the amount of anger and resentment a person has had in their lives, it’s how they handle it’s presence that makes the difference.
How you deal with it has everything to do with how you feel inside, and how much it affects your life. If you end up dwelling on it, it can really become a problem that can cast a cloud on almost every aspect of your life.
Dwelling on anger and resentment can feel so right
When you’ve been wronged, hurt, or disrespected it can be very easy to take it to heart and allow it to become a “favorite memory to relive”, something you go back to over and over in your mind.
You can relive it in great detail, going through all the same emotions, the same feelings that you had originally. Maybe you even think of how you could have responded at that exact moment but didn’t.
Maybe you go through it all again and again, repeatedly rethinking what you “should have said”. How you could have gotten it right. Turned it around.
Each time you go back and dwell on it you are generating within yourself the same fight or flight hormones that were brought on by the initial event. Strong internal “drugs”.
This puts your body and mind through the same stresses of the original event. This is unhealthy for you on many levels, but it also feels good in a weird way. You get a rush when you get lost in the thoughts of it all. That rush is addictive.
You can get accustomed to the rush of chemicals that enter your blood stream and if you go there too often it can become a habit that will feed itself. Truly a self administered drug addiction.
Letting go is a choice and you must choose it
To break the cycle, or better yet stop it before it starts you must learn to “let go” of your anger and resentment. You must CHOOSE to do it. It’s not natural for most.
You want control of your anger and resentment, rather than your anger and resentment controlling you, right? Then trust me, you need to let it go. Letting go means releasing completely.
If you release it completely, then it has no control over you. You won’t be addicted to reliving the upsetting moments, so you can move on to better thoughts. You’ll be free to be happy and calm rather than out of control mentally.
Unburden yourself, enjoy your life
You owe it to yourself to choose to let go of ALL of your past anger and resentment. Choosing to do so and working at it until it becomes a habit is one of the best things you can do to improve the quality of your life.
As you identify frequent addictive thoughts that regularly come back into your mind and choose to rationally and completely let them go, you’ll find that it feels very freeing.
As each successive one is identified and released, you will feel the burdens of that issue finally fall to the wayside. It can feel incredible to know you’ve chosen to free yourself from something that might have been an issue for years, even decades.
See how it feels to let it all go
Make up your mind right now that going forward, as you notice thoughts of anger and resentment, you’ll choose to let them go completely. For your own well being and happiness.
As they come up during normal life, just think about how dwelling on them is unhealthy mentally and physically, how it causes you unhappiness. How good it will feel to CHOOSE to completely let them go so that they have no control over you.
Then do it. Choose to let it go, you deserve to be free from it. Keep working at it as repetitive thoughts of anger and resentment come up.
As you begin to master this, you’ll realize that in place of all the anger and resentment that used to be swirling around in your mind, there will be a welcome calmness.